Chapter 18: Even the Steward Eats Shit?!

"Shifeng!!"

Liu Yan's eyes nearly split with rage. Every trace of his usual steward's dignity vanished as he threw back his head and let out a furious roar.

Unfortunately, Shifeng was too absorbed in his "eating shit" to pay the slightest attention to his master's howling.

Zhou Shi and Fang He, cowering behind him, witnessed the scene and immediately doubled over in another round of dry heaving.

Absolutely disgusting!

This spirit beast had eaten shit — could they even keep it anymore?!

Shouting was no longer going to stop Shifeng. Overcome with fury, Liu Yan abandoned all other concerns. His fingertips flashed and he barked a low command: "Seal!"

A solid, pale-blue spirit rune shot from his fingertip like a darting serpent and coiled around Shifeng's midsection.

Carrying the full pressure of a Foundation Establishment Stage cultivator, the rune instantly tightened into a binding seal and forcibly wrenched Shifeng — whose head was still buried in the stone pot — backward and out.

Shifeng yelped and scrabbled at the ground with all four paws, desperately trying to break free, but it was utterly hopeless. All it could do was clamp its jaws down hard on the sticky lump already in its mouth.

By the time it was dragged to Liu Yan's side, it gulped the mouthful down in two or three bites, then licked the corners of its mouth with lingering reluctance and let out a satisfied belch.

"Buuurp—"

A blast of air — reeking of raw flesh, char, rot, and the fermented sourness churning in its gut — erupted from its mouth and hit the three people nearby with such force that they all involuntarily toppled backward.

Zhou Shi and Fang He stared at Shifeng with wide, disbelieving eyes.

Had it just eaten its fill of shit?

You absolute bastard!!!!!

Liu Yan was screaming inside!

He whipped his gaze toward Bai Chen, who was slumped on the floor in a daze, and bellowed: "You have some nerve! How dare you privately concoct such filthy, foul matter and boil it inside a sect residence?! What do you have to say for yourself?!"

Bai Chen sat on the floor, still in a stupor.

He had been perfectly fine in his room doing Alchemy, and he'd been on the home stretch — barely half the pills left to roll — when the door suddenly exploded!

Wood splinters flew and clattered at his feet. Before he could even react, a huge dog that looked like a silly husky shot through the doorway like an arrow, making a beeline for the stone pot by the stove.

With a thunderous clang, it knocked the stone pot he'd set beside him onto the ground, buried its head inside, and began chomping away in great mouthfuls.

"Hey — Holy shit!"

He was counting on that whole pot of Inedia Pills to exchange for contribution points!

Bai Chen, heedless of the risk of being bitten, dove forward and threw his arms around the big dog's neck, yanking backward with all his might.

But the dog's strength was astonishing. No matter how hard he strained, he couldn't pull it away — it actually dragged him along with it.

Frantic and furious, he was locked in a standoff with the dog when a cold, heavy pressure suddenly enveloped the entire room.

That force slammed into him and sent him stumbling backward, crashing to the floor and landing hard on his backside.

He looked up to find a cultivator in a steward's robes glaring at him with blazing eyes, loudly accusing him of boiling shit and demanding to know what he deserved as punishment.

Holy shit!

A surge of aggrieved fury crashed over him.

He had been quietly doing Alchemy in his room, bothering no one, disturbing no one.

Now his door had been kicked in, his pills had been eaten, and he was being pointed at and berated?!

Even the most patient man has his limits!

He had been trying to keep a low profile, but in a situation like this, if he didn't speak up he wouldn't be a man!

"Senior Steward! Your disciple was minding his own business doing Alchemy — who did I bother? Your dog barged in and ate more than half of my pills, and I haven't even come to you to demand an explanation yet — how is this somehow my fault?!"

Liu Yan's furious shout died abruptly. The rage in his eyes was replaced by bewilderment.

His gaze swept over the stone pot, then landed on the few dark, dull pellets sitting on the bluestone slab. He hesitated before speaking: "Alchemy? You're saying this thing… is a pill?"

"Of course it is!"

Bai Chen held his head high, perfectly righteous.

"I was making Inedia Pills — the Mission Hall has a standing long-term mission that collects them!"

Liu Yan was of course aware that the Mission Hall had a standing collection mission for Inedia Pills, but Bai Chen was claiming that this shit-shaped thing was… an Inedia Pill?

Liu Yan fell silent.

Zhou Shi and Fang He were pinching their noses and lurking outside the doorway, waiting to watch Bai Chen get severely punished by the steward. When they heard this, both of them gaped in unison.

Inedia Pills?!

That thing was an Inedia Pill?

The two of them were going wild inside.

That stench — raw and charred and rotten, rivaling the reek of a cesspit — was still forcing its way into their nostrils. How could something like that be an Inedia Pill meant for eating?

Well, then again — who could eat anything after eating shit? Wouldn't that count as Inedia?

While the two were busy with their inner commentary, the previously silent Liu Yan suddenly moved.

He walked over with a furrowed brow and stopped beside the overturned stone pot.

He studied the sticky residue clinging to the inside of the pot for a moment, then glanced back at Shifeng — who had just let out another belch — and abruptly crouched down. He dipped his index finger into the pot, scooped up a small amount of the sticky paste, and placed it in his mouth to taste carefully.

Zhou Shi and Fang He: "!!"

Holy shit!

Both of them felt their pupils shake.

No way, no way?!

His spirit beast had already eaten this "shit," and now this Senior Steward was actually going to eat it too?!

Did the stewards of Hexu Sect have such… adventurous palates?!

Bai Chen watched Liu Yan pinch a bit of his "medicinal paste" between his fingers and put it in his mouth, and he too was stunned.

This pot of Inedia Pills had been made by his own hands.

He hadn't even considered tasting it himself — he'd been wanting to wash even the residue off his fingertips as quickly as possible.

Yet this steward hadn't even flinched, let alone frowned, and had just eaten it outright?!

Just because Bai Chen said it was an Inedia Pill, he was personally verifying it?

That was hardcore!

Liu Yan pressed his tongue against the paste and furrowed his brow slightly.

Not bad — not as… unacceptable as he'd imagined.

He slowly closed his eyes and focused his senses carefully.

When he opened them again, a flicker of surprise surfaced in his gaze.

He took out a handkerchief, wiped his hand, and stood up, looking at Bai Chen with a slow nod.

"This thing of yours is indeed an Inedia Pill. Crude in form — smells worse than shit but isn't as sticky — yet every effect an Inedia Pill should have is present without the slightest deficiency."

Outside the door, Zhou Shi and Fang He's jaws nearly hit the floor.

The two exchanged a glance, each seeing horror and disbelief mirrored in the other's eyes.

That thing… was actually an Inedia Pill?!

That stuff — whose smell could make a person retch, and which looked no different from excrement — was actually the Inedia Pill essential for closed-door cultivation?!

Both of them instantly imagined a future in the sect where they'd be clutching pills of this very same aroma and gnawing on them. Their stomachs lurched violently, and their legs began to go weak.

Bai Chen's eyes nearly popped out of his head when he heard Liu Yan's words.

Smells worse than shit but isn't as sticky?

So this steward had actually eaten shit before?

How else would he have a basis for comparison?

But his shock was quickly overtaken by wild elation.

A random stir in a stone pot and it turned into pills just like that?

A hundred-percent pill-formation talent really was something else!

Bai Chen looked at the overturned stone pot, and his eyes began to turn.

He crouched beside the pot, slumping his shoulders in a picture of dejection, and said: "Senior Steward, your disciple only just arrived and had to spend every last coin to his name just to afford the materials for this one batch of Inedia Pills. I was hoping to refine them and exchange them for some contribution points, but now the materials are all ruined. My contribution points…"

He left the sentence unfinished and looked up at Liu Yan with a pitiful expression.

Liu Yan understood perfectly well what he meant.

He turned and glanced at Shifeng by his feet. The wretched beast was staring longingly at the overturned pot, tail wagging furiously — clearly not yet satisfied — with not a shred of awareness that it had caused any trouble.

He rubbed his brow and sighed inwardly.

When all was said and done, it was his Shifeng that had kicked the door in and destroyed the disciple's pills. He couldn't very well let a junior disciple take the loss for nothing.

Liu Yan waved a hand at Bai Chen, who was watching him with hopeful eyes: "Fine. The contribution points this pot of Inedia Pills would have earned — I'll cover them for you."

The moment those words landed, the sorrow on Bai Chen's face evaporated instantly.

"Many thanks, Senior Steward! Senior Steward is discerning and magnanimous!"

He presented the pills he had already rolled with both hands and said with a cheerful grin:

"There are thirty-two here. As for the pot, let's just call it twenty-eight to round it off — sixty pills in total, that's six contribution points. Thank you for your patronage!"

Liu Yan: "…"